


Our little talks

by Furud



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Alternative Timeline, F/M, Implied/Referenced Incest, Pre Season 3, Sibling Incest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-14
Updated: 2015-08-14
Packaged: 2018-04-14 14:58:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 978
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4568826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Furud/pseuds/Furud
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>That time Cersei, that time I jumped from that cliff in Casterly Rock. You love that story. Always used it as an example of my irresponsibility. Remember the first time I kissed you, when were ten, under the sheets. You opened your eyes and said that we shouldn’t do that. I told you that we could do anything, we are Lannisters</p>
            </blockquote>





	Our little talks

**Author's Note:**

> Jaimes dies before reaching King's Landing with Brienne 
> 
> (Inspired by the song Little Talks - Of Monsters and Men)

The first thing James notices when he opens his eyes again is that he has both hands again. The second thing he notices is that he is dead, and it doesn’t feels so bad.

The third thing he notices is Her. She looks like a tall pale lady, all in black and with a peaceful expression, but troubled eyes. He distantly knows she is Death. “My Lady” he says bowing, because he is Jaime Lannister after all.

Everything is blurry around him, the world is a mesh of colors and shapes, it reminds him of the color palette of the painter that made his father’s portrait back at home.

“Home” he thinks and he is somewhere, but it isn’t Casterly Rock. It’s Cersei’s bedroom in King's Landing, and she is standing there, pouring wine to her cup. The sun is shining in an afternoon glow, and he calculates it's about 4 or 5 o’clock

Death is still there thought, and extends a pale hand towards him. Jaime shook his head. He doesn’t know where he is going. Supposes is not to the good place, and besides, his place is with Cersei. Always with Cersei.

Death tightens her lips but still doesn’t say anything, turning around and leaving.

He follows Cersei. It’s weird at first (not following her, he has been doing that his whole life), to be able to stare at her, pick all the little details without worrying about someone catching him and what-would-they-say. She is beautiful, all cheekbones and long lashes and rage.

She doesn’t smile. Well, she does, but in the fake way she has learned to appear in court. He knows better, Cersei’s true smile is blinding, all teeth and tiny adorable wrinkles in her nose even when she was still a kid. Now she is always tense, rigid back and cautious eyes, looking everywhere for an enemy. Not even at night she relaxes, keeping a dagger under her pillow and waking up with any creak. He can’t touch her. He has tried obviously, but it’s an exercise in futility, his hand moving right through her arm. Feels like water, there’s resistance but without anything to grasp, so he doesn’t tries again.

He doesn’t know what’s going on. He _can_ hear but would rather the conversation down. All the power struggles, the tiny actions shifting the balance of The Game, didn’t matter to him when he was alive. He just served Cersei, and now that he is dead, couldn’t give a shit anymore.

It’s painful to see her when Joffrey dies. She goes to the funeral, and then goes to her dorms and doesn’t go out for a week. She barely moves or eats at that time, curled in bed.

That’s when he starts talking to her. And then screaming. She must live, she must, for Tommen and Myrcella, not let those bastards win, please Cersei, please. He doesn’t know if she can hear him but one day she stands up and calls her maid. Takes a long bath and appears at dinner, dressed in black, without any crack in her façade, full of vengeance and quiet thirst of blood, but alive.

So he keeps talking to her. Sometimes he can pretend she’s listening, her gaze lost while looking through the windows, like she’s remembering too, that time Cersei, that time I jumped from that cliff in Casterly Rock. You love that story. Always used it as an example of my irresponsibility. Remember the first time I kissed you, when were ten, under the sheets. You opened your eyes and said that we shouldn’t do that. I told you _we could do anything,_ _we are Lannisters._

One day she starts talking back. “Jaime” she says at night, and only on her lips his name sounds right “I don’t even know if I’m right anymore”

She keeps doing it too. Always at night, sometimes a word or two, sometimes long angry rants. He nods and sometimes smiles, because even if he were alive and right there she wouldn’t listen to his advice. So full of hate and pride. “Come back already” she says one time, and somewhere where his heart was, it aches.

She watches her break a second time. A raven arrives and when she reads the paper it carries, his name written on it, she collapses, crying, with long screams of pure pain. “I’m sorry” he says, over and over “I’m sorry I broke my promise”

Maester Pycelle slips poppy milk in her wine at their father request that night. She falls asleep almost unwillingly, still shaking. Her maid undresses her and tucks her in. He kneels beside her, watches her uneven breathe, wishing he was able to at least arrange the strands of hair that has fallen to her face. He whispers her name, getting his forehead against her.

There's a blink, and suddenly he’s on a beach. Everything looks a bit fuzzy but that doesn’t matter because fifteen years old Cersei is watching at him in the eyes, the last time they were the same height “Don’t be an idiot, we can’t live in a giant’s eye” she says rolling her eyes but smiling and he starts laughing because he remembers this, it’s a memory and this is a dream. She is dreaming, and everyone knows that in dreams the dead can talk. So he says “I love you Cersei” and takes her hands and it _almost_ feels real. She looks around “You can’t say those things here. Someone could be listening” he shakes his head and kisses her “I will always love you” she sighs and shakes her head, sitting down in the sand. He sits down beside her and she puts her head on his shoulder “I will wait for you here” he mutters and looks up at the sea.

He has the feeling he won’t wait too long.


End file.
